Saturday, May 23, 2009

Born Again in Bangkok


Dear Ones:

Elizabeth Barrett Browning famously asked, How do I love thee? She never enumerated the ways nor did she do anything so mundane as to give examples. Instead Browning describes the times when you might look at your partner, presumably at the appropriate romantic moment, and think, you are My Only. Most of the time, it is because a lifetime of shared experience, of joy, hope, and sorrow come rushing back to you, and you remember it all with gratitude and recognition. And so it was on a rainy Friday afternoon in Bangkok.

There's a change in plan, Andy said. He had called me on my cellphone at school. Eddie is going to be baptized at 5 o'clock this afternoon. He added, It's going to be a surprise for Phyllis. And by the way, I'm going to be his godfather!

When Andy told me the news I was taken by surprise. It couldn't have been a sudden decision; I was sure Eddie had been thinking about it a long time because he's that kind of person. He doesn't make decisions lightly.

I was about to leave school when Andy called again. Do me a favor, will you? He began. Go home and get me a change of clothes. I have a meeting too so I can't come pick you up. Take a taxi to the church. That's how it is after 30 some years of marriage; you dispense with all formalities.

It had started to rain as I left the school but by the time I got home, it was over. I took advantage of the lull to set off for the paak soi to hail a taxi. When I told the driver my destination in Thai, he said one word in English, highway? I agreed because it's faster. I thought: it never fails. When I want to practice speaking Thai, the Thai will want to practice his English.

We made it through the tollgate when the cab inexplicably slowed. I looked up at the driver. He turned around in his seat and wai-ed. He had forgotten to set the meter until now. When we got to the church in Soi Ruamrudee, I gave him an extra generous tip to cover the cost of the entire trip. By this time, the heavens had opened up again and it was raining hard.

Most of the players were at the church. Or its environs. I met Andy and handed over his change of clothes. I saw Joan Windsor, co-coordinator with her brother Dan of the North Point reunion and intrepid baptism organizer. She was in her decisive pose, right hand to her ear, talking into her cellphone. I learned that Phyllis did not suspect a thing. After visiting the dressmaker for a fitting, Phyllis was with Mimi at Neil's Tavern nearby. And having coffee and cake, I presumed. I was hungry, deliberately saving my appetite for the buffet at the JW Marriott that evening.

Dan arrived with Father Van, Eddie's former teacher at North Point. Now a hale 83, Father was going to perform the baptism. So, I realized, that's why it had to be now, after the North Point reunion, and before everyone scattered to the four winds. Everything had come full circle.

Inside the church, there was another family sitting in the front pew with a baby also waiting for it to be baptized. We didn't have much time. After he had changed his clothes, Andy called Mimi; it's time, he said. Mimi said later that Phyllis was about to drink a steaming cup of hot chocolate. After talking to Andy, she took away Phyllis's cup. Let's make it to go, she suggested. They got in Mimi's car and drove half a block to the church. Still, Father Van was on a tight time line. He started the baptism even though Phyllis hadn't arrived yet. Eddie and Andy huddled in front of Father Van on the altar steps. Behind Father the gilt statue of Christ the Redeemer raised its arms in supplication. Please, God... Listener of prayers and intercessions, witness to baptisms, weddings, and funerals. Titi's funeral was in this church almost two months to the day. Eddie looked over his shoulder, searching for Phyllis. This is for you, he must have been thinking. When are you going to come?

Five minutes later, Mimi and Phyllis walked up the aisle. Phyllis, carrying her cup of hot chocolate, looked puzzled. Eddie was wearing the white and gold coat of the baptism candidate and he was in a clinch with Father Van and Andy. Mimi said to her, I don't know how to tell you this...By the time she had finished, Phyllis was crying. She went to join Eddie at the altar steps in front of Father Van. Widening the huddle, she stood on his left, Andy on his right. And so it was that Eddie was baptized, received his first Holy Communion, and was confirmed all in one afternoon.

Reunions are often occasions for sentimental gestures. Sometimes, the spirit of togetherness is strong enough to compel us to act on a deeply held wish. Indeed, Eddie's decision to be baptized was a grand gesture of faith and love, and I would say, good fortune. How lucky that Father Van was here and the church was available. How privileged that we could be here to share this special moment. Life doesn't skip a beat; it goes on. It's up to us, after the euphoria fades, to carry on with the hard work of building faith and continuity. It's part of the commitment to God and each other.

Walk good,
Jo Anne